Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Plan of Study

I wish you could make your own major in college. If so, I would have wanted to graduate with my Bachelor of Arts in Fabulousity. Here's what the program track would have looked like:

Freshman Year:
Glambition 101
How to Work it in a Sweats and a Hoodie
Makeup Dos and Don'ts
How to avoid The Walk of Shame
Breaking out of that awkward phase
Dancing on tabletops: pros and cons
The Wristlet: Your BFF

Sophomore Year:
Glambition 201 (Honors)
Low rise pants: dos and don'ts
Push-up bras: Your BFF
What did I do last night?/How did I get here? (Lab section)
VPL prevention 201
Cocktails 201
Heels: How high is too high?

Junior Year:
Fierce, Ferosh, Ferocity 301
How to get free drinks all night
Bisexuality 302
Independent Study: NYC Fashion Week (Spring)
Penis size: how big is TOO big?
No Panties: Slutty or Comfy?
Your Vibrator: Your BFF

Senior Year:
Independent Study: Labels and Love
Thesis: Tits or Ass - Which really matters?
Independent Study: Turning heads, Breaking Necks
Workshop: Threesomes - who's turn is it?
Thesis: Missionary or Doggy Style?
Workshop: Blowjobs - how to perfect your technique

What would YOUR dream degree consist of?

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