You know what? I take it all back. I'm not sorry.
I have no remorse. I'm a big girl now and I'll do whatever the fuck I want.
All my life I have been mousy, meek, passive, pushed around, used, taken advantage of. I let people use their leverage against me to guilt me, make me pity them, make me feel sorry for the bullshit they have done to me, make me feel like I don't have the right to just walk away, like I have to give a shit about you when you couldn't give two shits about me. I let those thoughts consume me, eat away at me, hold me down with their emotional baggage while I tried to find a way to apologize and make things right, to life these weights off my chest when I was never the one who put them there; I was trying to apologize for things that weren't my fault.
I no longer want to feel jailed by my actions or guilted by the thought of the feelings of the others that I have hurt. I'm getting too old for that.
I am not that girl anymore.
And if you don't like it, get the fuck over it.
/I'm done.
